Beauty Isn't Always About Makeup

A7X.JPG

My entire life I have been told that beauty is more than what you see on the outside, but for some reason, it didn't truly sink in until recently. Living in a society where information, images, and opinions are readily available and easy to share or access has been one of the most hindering pieces in my progress of reaching this state of understanding. Scrolling through social media I would see ads, posts, shared articles 'showing' me what beauty was: slender figure, almond eyes, oval face, thick hair that is the perfect color (what does that even mean?), etc.

For a few years, I found myself obsessed with trying to obtain the 'perfect' image. Obsessed to the point that, at one point, I was down to a size 0, working out daily, coloring my hair every 3 weeks, added hair extensions, wouldn't let my boyfriend (now husband) see me without makeup or eyelashes on, and knew that exact pose to make myself look 'thinner' in photos. I was a pro at comparing myself to girls I considered prettier and skinnier than I was. While all of these things aren't necessarily bad, I was missing the inner peace with who I was. I was trying to become someone that doesn't exist. My hair was never the right color, though looking back on photos of it now, it was a gorgeous color. I was never thin enough. I was never pretty enough. I cared about my image, and what others may have thought about how I looked, far more than making sure I was mentally and emotionally healthy with myself. 

Fast forward a few years after realizing I would never be 'perfect', I was in a major downward spiral. I stopped getting ready every day, I gained 35 pounds, I wanted nothing to do with socializing, and had convinced myself that this was who I was meant to be. 

While I am still perfectly ok with sitting at home for an entire weekend with my husband, not leaving the house to even get food if we needed it (true story!); I now have a better understanding that there needs to be a balance between the two extremes. Do I need to get ready every single day? Heck. No. I will, however, get ready a few times a week. Do I need to work out and eat a super strict and clean diet to hopefully fit into a size 0 again? Ummm, no. But what I put into my body is extremely important to me, and I still make sure I eat foods that won't harm me. Will I stop comparing myself to others? Ha, I am still human. And, I am a firm believer in a continual progression toward bettering myself. 

Being beautiful is far more than what meets the eye. It's about how I view myself, how I treat others, and who I am when no one is around to hold me accountable. Beautiful people are all around us, doing amazing deeds and living selflessly! My daily goals to help keep me balanced: 

  • One random act of kindness. As simple as coffee for a friend, a thank you note to a coworker or paying for someone's order behind me in the drive-thru. It doesn't have to be world-changing. 
  • Personal development time. This is usually in the car commuting to work. Audio books, uplifting soundtracks, or quiet time to meditate. 
  • Time with my spouse. It may seem crazy and over the top for some couples, but this is something I have found is important to me and my marriage. Whether it's having dinner together, watching a show or movie, playing a video game or just chatting about life or what happened that day.
  • Eating foods that agree with my body. Everyone is different for a reason, that includes how our bodies process foods. For me, carbs are not my best friends. They make my insomnia, PCOS and endometriosis symptoms much worse. Making sure to read nutrition labels and helping my body stay as energized as possible is the least I can do for it being kind to me throughout this journey of a life.

Be kind to yourself and others; we are all doing the best we know how <3

Eleshia Terry